I am at my wits end with my 6 yr old son. He was diagnosed with in december of 2014. His behavior at school, at home with me and at his fathers. He has even threatened to kill his 12 yr old sister. tried to push her down the stairs in the house. How do i discipline him:( His father and I divorced and now he spends one week with me and my new husband and a week with his father. I just dont know what to do with him anymore, cuz if I give him a swat on the butt his father will call the cops and say that i am abusing him but if i do nothing its not good either.
I'm certainly not an expert, but I would advise that you discuss this with your Doctor as soon as you can, and I would mention ALL of it, so he is aware of what you are up against at all ends. Ask him for his best advice. He may even refer you to a specialist.
Sending my best,
Have you tried to take away his favorite thing for like an hour? What we were told to do is sit our son in time out for a little while and it didnt help swats didnt help at home taking his favorite thing away for a few hours helps that day. I hope it helps.
Do you have a copy of your Parenting Plan? There are guidelines and rules about communication between parents about the children’s healthcare and other needs. It sounds like these guidelines will be especially helpful if both you and your ex-husband have already agreed to them.
If you and your ex cannot afford lawyers some communities have legal clinics where a volunteer lawyer can help you clarify any parts you find to be unclear. When you know who the doctor or therapist is you can find out how children living in two households can best be supported.
Parents usually need help learning parenting skills that will effective, and I remember learning a lot of very useful things from a family therapist. It was a team effort, kids included.
Your frustration level sounds pretty high right now, but you might try to get an idea of what else your son might need that might be provided in simple ways like just connecting over a story or his play, and try for some gentle time together. I hope that’s possible. Wishing you patience for now.
Jasmin, a situation like this requires help from professionals. Also, it is best to be proactive about involving Family Services, so that they are fully aware of the situation before an incident happens.
The first few months of a diagnosis are hard on everyone. I think right now you have to think in terms of treatment rather than discipline. Your son's behaviour is obviously not acceptable, but try to remember that his ADHD makes him impulsive and irrational....it is not who he really is. When I am at my wits end with my 7 year old, I really do have to breathe deeply and force myself to remember that he doesn't want to act this way.... sometimes, he can't help himself. And I imagine how frustrating it must be for him to feel so out of control in his own mind.
I echo everyone's opinions in that you need to get him to a doctor (preferably a specialist/pediatrician) as soon as you can. Your son (and you) need help managing his condition.
In the meantime, hang in there, breathe deeply and do the best you can. Don't beat yourself up for feeling frustrated, but remove yourself from the room if you feel like you are losing control. There have been many times where I recognize my level of frustration is getting too high, and I call in my husband (my son's stepdad) to take over.
I’m sorry I can’t add any advice, as its already been said…just want to say that I’m thinking of you and yes, don’t beat yourself up about it. My son doesn’t have the hyperactivity element so my frustration levels weren’t too bad when he was at school age.
Sending a big hug x