Hi, my eldest son is 6 years old and I’m struggling quite a bit with him. I would like some advice on how people knew they or they’re child had ADHD/ADD. Also how you get diagnosed. He is a lovely boy when he wants to be, cuddly and affectionate but can also be destructive, spiteful, malicious and really rude. Doesn’t listen to me and discipline wise he doesn’t respond to. He doesnt pay attention at school and can be very diacruptive. Likes to shout out alot, can’t concentrate on work for too long and has told his teaching no when asked to do it as well as flood the toilets and taken stuff from there. He steals at home, nannies families or even when out in town. His attitude can be horrible and he shows no respect to me at all. I really need some help and advice please.
I tried for many years to help both of my children who were also some what like your son. It took me 4-5 years to finally find a psychologist talk to my daughter and say yes she has ADHD. She had a psychologist in a different part of Pennsylvania say " oh she just needs help learning to get organised and someone to help her with her feelings" so we had two therapists coming in and out of our house for a year and the one would treat her so badly at school that my daughter would cry and beg me to make her stop coming. So after two weeks I did tell the therapist to hit the road it was too traumatizing for her. So when we moved this last time we found a wonderful doctor that told us what was wrong and that did not want to medicate her until he could see her more and watch how she acted without the meds which was very nice. My daughter has days where i swear she has a light switch.... one minute she is nice as can be then when you ask her to do something she gets mad and it is like the exorcist and her head spins. lol it doesn't really but sometimes i wonder. I try very hard to be patient but times i just need to walk away and come back to her and retry what i was doing to see if i get a different result. My daughter likes to sneak snacks while we are not looking. I found out she told my son that what we don't know wont hurt her well it did cause we moved the snacks lol. She also interrupts people when they are talking and when she wants something she will stand in front of you and just sigh until we finally ask her what she wants. There are days were I would like to just let her stand there til she opens her mouth and asks but I know that she can not help it. So you are not alone there are other moms out there that are going threw this too. All i can say is to ask your family doctor to refer you to a psychologist and go from there. I wish you the best of luck! Happy Holidays!!!
My first advice Keran is to be prepared for a journey. There is no quick diagnosis or fix for children with ADHD. My son was 6 when he was diagnosed but it took a year to determine if the ADHD was related to depression or if his depression was caused by his frustration with the ADHD symptoms. The first step is to find an excellent doctor well-known for assessing children that young. The doctor will give the parents a survey to fill out about the behaviors and she will ask for the same feedback from his teachers or any other adults who have regular contact with him. Our doctor was conservative with medication and recommended behavioral therapy as the first step in treatment. This was helpful to my son and the rest of our family because it gave us all a better understanding of the parenting techniques that work and don’t work with ADHD kids. We ended up putting him on medication at 8 years old and have continued therapy as needed. He’s 11 now and I’m sure we will continue adjusting his treatment as he hits the teen years. I hope this gives you an idea of where to start and what to expect as the treatment goes forward. Best of luck to you.
Thank you both, so glad there are people like you to talk too Xx he can be a really good boy, the other day he tidied and hoovered his own room willingly and I told him how proud I was then a few minutes later he was on one. He had hit his brother. Had snuck in my room stole stuff from it and completely reversed from all the good behaviour. He has a LSA at school to help him because he struggles to concentrate and a counselor which he enjoys but it doesn’t seem to work, even one to one with him Seems to be a struggle as we get close then like a switch goes off and it all changes. I will be looking into doctors to see who is beat with children Xx
Keran, I took my sons to a child and adolescent psychologist to be diagnosed. The son I didn't think had ADD was diagnosed first. My other son was diagnosed with oppositional defiant disorder. Childhood can be tough for these kids because on some level they'll be trying to do their best socially and in school, anxiety or pressure may have built up during the day and they let loose at home. Physical exercise helps release some of that. The psychologist helped me learn better parenting behavior, too, like how to enforce a time-out in the grocery store. If you find a good psychologist it will help.
My son was diagnosed at 6 as well and it has been and still is a roller coaster. Hang on tight and do what the others said about finding a good doctor early on. Routine and consistency is helpful I find and not entertaining an argument with him. Soft voice works best even when you want to scream and pull your hair out. Patience as they say is a virtue but not always the easiest to come by. My son is 12 now and we are on our 3rd medication which works okay but he still has problems with focus, concentration, and impulsivity. Hang in there and share your answers with us.