Oh my gosh. I couldn't function without medication. I've tried. But my case is pretty severe, I guess. Finding something I like to do...wish it was that simple for me. Great it works for you, though.
Oh yeah, I've heard people say they go to appts way early. I would feel I was giving up valuable time by going so early. But the times I have done it, it has been so nonstressful & I feel so much better about myself that it's worth it.
aaron~Typical response, right? "Oh, yeah, I do that, too." She sounds so sweet.
It is definitely getting worse for me. I am determined to find a line of work that I can do without meds. outside of work I don't need them at all. At work I am an idiot without them, but it is what it is. Someone wrote on here about us being hard on ourselves. OMG is that true! I say things to myself or about myself to others that I wouldn't say to my worst enemy. That sure can't be good.
Oh, as far as tardiness goes, give me at least 10 minutes plus, even when it’s a " let’s have a cup of coffee at that bakery near your place" type appointment- btw, it’s really literally down the street from my building so… no, you’re not the only one
and, finding something I like…well, that’s,um, you know, I like so many things…and kind of switch my interests/hobbies every month or so…
Sticking with something I really like is what I can’t do, my brain keeps pulling me away like mommy in a toy store ( think I just read that analogy somewhere).
So, dull things- hell,really- into- it type things- hell in disguise
I do know. I am 47 and I can't find it. By the way I will get to work on time, but I will waste hour after hour. I figured since I was a kid, I literally wasted about 8 years of my life either staring at a clock, doodling on paper or now playing solitaire on my phone for hours and hours..
It getting to the point where she gives up. And doesn't want to talk. No I don't have a Dr to talk to .I don't feel comfortable with them.
adhdgrownup said:
pretty little liars freak~ It's heartbreaking sometimes, isn't it. That's why support groups are so important. We do understand what you're going through. It's difficult enough to have to try and function in a non-ADD world, but to have to listen to criticism and deal with skepticism and the, sometimes, cruelty of others makes it worse. I wish I had an answer for you that would be more helpful, but the fact is that adults with ADHD tend to become more & more isolative because of situations like yours. When we say ADHD, it conjurs up a picture of a restless little boy who can't sit still in school. Is your mom willing to listen? As for me, I am older and find that even if I explain to someone in my family who appears to listen, as soon as I display some ADHD behavior, it's obvious it really isn't understood. Recently I didn't return my mother-in-law's phone call for a week and when I finally did and tried to explain that I really didn't realize she had left a message and that I had been overwhelmed lately, she continued to let me know how angry she was at me throughout the conversation. When I said I didn't even realize I had a vm message she replied, "Didn't know you had a message? What are you, insane?!" I have since just backed off. I don't need the added stress of people's attacks. You are living in the same house, though, which makes it harder. Take care of yourself right now. Have you tried talking with a therapist? Having someone to talk to on a regular basis could be very helpful to you. pretty little liars freak said:
No one has adhd but me .no one gets who I am because of what I have. They say we know what you're going through but they don't . They don't get how our minds are .or how we think or what makes sense to you in your logic they don't want to hear it and think it's a stupid idea . I live with my family which I hate living here . They don't listen and interrupt while I'm talking to my mom .telling me to shut up when I'm talking loud or yelling. I'm 34 . They don't get or want to deal with it . When I'm having trouble with talking about problems with my mom. People who are normal will never get what we think or act because of being different.no one will get us . Only people with ADHD will get each other
Your comments are important to me, as the parent of 3 ADHD kids. It reminds me how my kids must feel and makes me aware that the visual lists, cues etc are necessary. I get accused of 'babying' my kids a lot, by many people, but I persist in doing what feels right to for them. I tried really hard to help my 14 yr old organize her school work to no avail. I noticed that when she created her own 'order' for her room it was maintained much better than when I implemented a system, so this year I let her determine what would work best for school. She chose her own (coloured) system and I provided her with all the things she felt she needed to maintain. She is so proud of herself for designing something that works and she has stayed on top of all the work in her 1st year of high school.
I find that the struggles that ADHD adults face, remind me that I am not wrong to continue to put supports in place for my kids. I can trust my gut instinct and I am not the world's worst parent! Thank you all for your openness to share your experiences.
pretty little liars freak~You wouldn't have to talk to a Dr. There are social workers, coaches. I once went to a clinic in town for people without insurance and saw a student who helped me structure my day & to talk about family relationships, etc. It takes a little digging to find what you need, but they're out there. Are you taking medication?
3Gkids, students who have learned they can create external organizing helps/systems to navigate through the week easier have gained a very important skill! Your daughter understands this now and is able to help herself independently! That’s great! If she needs you, you’re there.
Until your kids can create an environment for success on their own, you’re teaching, not babying. Sounds like teamwork to me.
Hey all, just posting to let you know, I won’t be posting (;))over the next couple of days. Checking into the hospital in the morning to get a navel hernia fixed(at least I hope:) )
Wish me luck!
